--- title: "Indecision and Regret: The Inner Monologue" description: "Discover how shifting your focus from big-picture goals to everyday "in-between" moments can reduce indecision and regret, leading to a more fulfilling life." lang: en json-ld: | [ { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "Person", "@id": "https://christianespinosa.com/#person", "name": "Christian Espinosa", "url": "https://christianespinosa.com/", "image": "https://christianespinosa.com/__l5e/assets-v1/de07e44b-a8e0-4bcc-bcb0-13aec15421f1/headshot-front.jpg", "sameAs": [ "https://www.facebook.com/christian.espinosa.official", "https://x.com/Ironracer", "https://www.instagram.com/christian.espinosa.official/", "https://www.youtube.com/@ChristianEspinosaOfficial", "https://www.linkedin.com/in/christianespinosa/" ], "jobTitle": "Bestselling Author, Keynote Speaker, Entrepreneur", "worksFor": { "@type": "Organization", "name": "Blue Goat Cyber", "url": "https://bluegoatcyber.com/" } }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://christianespinosa.com/#website", "name": "Christian Espinosa", "url": "https://christianespinosa.com/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://christianespinosa.com/#organization" }, "inLanguage": "en-US" }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://christianespinosa.com/#organization", "name": "Christian Espinosa", "url": "https://christianespinosa.com/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://christianespinosa.com/logo.svg" }, "founder": { "@id": "https://christianespinosa.com/#person" }, "sameAs": [ "https://www.facebook.com/christian.espinosa.official", "https://x.com/Ironracer", "https://www.instagram.com/christian.espinosa.official/", "https://www.youtube.com/@ChristianEspinosaOfficial", "https://www.linkedin.com/in/christianespinosa/" ] }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "Article", "headline": "Indecision and Regret: The Inner Monologue - Christian Espinosa", "description": "Discover how shifting your focus from big-picture goals to everyday \"in-between\" moments can reduce indecision and regret, leading to a more fulfilling life.", "image": "https://christianespinosa.com/__l5e/assets-v1/4f5cc59e-a17b-4369-9104-e4d77a1c6773/indecision-and-regret-the-inner-monologue-card.png", "datePublished": "2024-04-29T22:32:14+00:00", "dateModified": "2026-06-26T05:35:32.333Z", "mainEntityOfPage": { "@type": "WebPage", "@id": "https://christianespinosa.com/blog/indecision-and-regret-the-inner-monologue" }, "author": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Christian Espinosa", "url": "https://christianespinosa.com/about" }, "publisher": { "@type": "Organization", "name": "Christian Espinosa", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://christianespinosa.com/logo.svg" } } }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "FAQPage", "mainEntity": [ { "@type": "Question", "name": "What is the core idea behind \"Indecision and Regret: The Inner Monologue - Christian Espinosa\"?", "acceptedAnswer": { "@type": "Answer", "text": "Almost everyone has an inner dialogue. This conversation that goes on inside our heads replays a lot of indecision and regret. When we don’t do things" } }, { "@type": "Question", "name": "Who is this post for?", "acceptedAnswer": { "@type": "Answer", "text": "Honestly, anyone who suspects the real life is happening in the ordinary hours, not the milestones. If you want a listicle, this is not that. If you want the honest version of what I have actually lived and worked through, keep reading." } }, { "@type": "Question", "name": "How do I actually apply this, not just nod along?", "acceptedAnswer": { "@type": "Answer", "text": "Pick the single line in the post that made you flinch or look away, and change one thing in your week because of it. One choice this week beats a whole framework you never touch." } } ] } ] --- [Skip to content](#main) [](/) [About](/about)[Speaking](/speaking)[Cybersecurity](/cybersecurity)[Programs](/programs)[Books](/books)[Media](/media) Writing Search Ctrl K[Connect](/connect) [The In-Between](/blog/category/the-in-between) # Indecision and Regret: The Inner Monologue April 29, 2024 2 min read 542 words I have an inner dialogue. Everyone does. This conversation that goes on inside my head replays a lot of indecision and regret. When I don’t do things my gut tells me I should, I am left with these two things. ![](/__l5e/assets-v1/b9335aa4-2a16-48d0-8497-7a264df4558f/6c141582ddd7.jpg) The takeaways 1. 01 This conversation that goes on inside my head replays a lot of indecision and regret. 2. 02 When I don’t do things my gut tells me I should, I am left with these two things. What to do next Pick one conversation you have been putting off where things is the real subject, and have it before the week ends. 3. 03 Much of the friction in this inner dialogue is due to only focusing on the macro-moments of life. 4. 04 These are the milestones and big-picture happenings in life. I have an inner dialogue. Everyone does. This conversation that goes on inside my head replays a lot of indecision and regret. When I don’t do things my gut tells me I should, I am left with these two things. Much of the friction in this inner dialogue is due to only focusing on the macro-moments of life. These are the milestones and big-picture happenings in life. I used to give more emphasis to the macro versus the micro. Unfortunately, it created an environment where I ignored the present and obsessed about the future. My inner dialogues were filled with stressful lamentations centering around indecision and regret. Why didn’t I do this or say that? It wasn’t until I had time to reflect and reset my identity that I began to give the macro its due. My story of this realization is in my book _[The In-Between: Life in the Micro](https://www.amazon.com/Between-Life-Micro-Christian-Espinosa/dp/B0CP9WT8J7)_. ## Why Are Indecision and Regret Such Constants in Life? I would not characterize myself as indecisive. I’ve made plenty of well-thought-out and quick decisions personally and professionally. Were they always right? Of course not. However, there were many moments of indecisiveness. I just didn’t see them as such because they seemed trivial and insignificant in terms of the macro. Regret has also been in the pattern. I’ve found the deepest regrets are those you don’t realize for some time. Then you can replay them in your mind a million times, wishing things would be different. But they aren’t, and you have to accept things for what they are. I did not want to live a life of regret or indecisiveness regarding the micro. So, I embraced the in-between and all I could learn from it. I had to make a change, including my inner dialogue. ## Inner Dialogues and the In-Between Before I decided to evolve my focus and priorities, my inner dialogue at in-between moments was often about inconvenience or impatience. I would easily disconnect from the experiences if they weren’t what I wanted in terms of the macro. Those thought patterns had to change if I wanted to live a happier, fuller life in the micro. I started doing things like setting informed intentions. An intention is an expectation, but when informed, it’s more flexible and allows you to adapt to the circumstances. I also began to see the value in interactions with others. There was more to life than reaching some big goal or crossing a finish line. When those were my obsessions, my inner dialogue was stern and unyielding. I needed to be more aware of myself and others to do this. I had to address the dialogue to move myself into a serving state, which also meant taking my ego out of the equation. It was hard work and not for the faint of heart. It was absolutely worth it. Maybe it’s time for you to make similar changes so indecision and regret don’t consume your thoughts. Hopefully, my book can be a guide. [https://www.amazon.com/Between-Life-Micro-Christian-Espinosa/dp/B0CP9WT8J7/](https://www.amazon.com/Between-Life-Micro-Christian-Espinosa/dp/B0CP9WT8J7/) Frequently asked ### What is the core idea behind "Indecision and Regret: The Inner Monologue - Christian Espinosa"? ### Who is this post for? ### How do I actually apply this, not just nod along? ### Work with me I help founders and cybersecurity leaders build teams that ship, not teams that stall. If that's the problem you're trying to solve, let's talk. [Start a conversation](/contact) Share this essay [X ](https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?url=https%3A%2F%2Fchristianespinosa.com%2Fblog%2Findecision-and-regret-the-inner-monologue&text=Indecision%20and%20Regret%3A%20The%20Inner%20Monologue) [LinkedIn](https://www.linkedin.com/sharing/share-offsite/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fchristianespinosa.com%2Fblog%2Findecision-and-regret-the-inner-monologue) [Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fchristianespinosa.com%2Fblog%2Findecision-and-regret-the-inner-monologue) [Email](mailto:?subject=Indecision%20and%20Regret%3A%20The%20Inner%20Monologue&body=https%3A%2F%2Fchristianespinosa.com%2Fblog%2Findecision-and-regret-the-inner-monologue)Copy link ![Christian Espinosa, headshot](/__l5e/assets-v1/de07e44b-a8e0-4bcc-bcb0-13aec15421f1/headshot-front.jpg) About the author [Christian Espinosa](/about) · Founder & CEO, Blue Goat Cyber Christian is the founder and CEO of Blue Goat Cyber, a medical device cybersecurity firm. He's an Air Force Academy graduate, 24x Ironman, climber of two of the Seven Summits, and the author of The Smartest Person in the Room and The In-Between: Life in the Micro. Keep reading - [ ### How to Be Good at Being Present - Christian Espinosa Same thread: the in between. Read essay → ](/blog/how-to-be-good-at-being-present) - [ ### Don't Stop Believing: The Comeback Isn't Dramatic | Christian Espinosa Same thread: the in between. Read essay → ](/blog/dont-stop-believing-the-comeback-isnt-dramatic) - [ ### Are You Caught in the Success Trap? - Christian Espinosa Same thread: the in between. Read essay → ](/blog/are-you-caught-in-the-success-trap) [← Previous essay Focusing on the Macro at the Expense of the Moment - Christian Espinosa ](/blog/focusing-on-the-macro-at-the-expense-of-the-moment)[Next essay → Unexpected Connections Can Have a Big Impact - Christian Espinosa ](/blog/unexpected-connections-can-have-a-big-impact) Related, The In-Between ### Live in the In-Between Christian's philosophy on micro vs. macro, awareness, and intentional living, explored in talks, essays, and his books. [Connect with Christian](/connect) Christian Espinosa Bestselling author, keynote speaker, and Founding CEO of [Blue Goat Cyber](https://bluegoatcyber.com/). Helping technical leaders develop the soft skills that turn brilliance into impact. 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