Focusing on the Macro at the Expense of the Moment

I think about macro and micro as two different ways to look at my life. Macro is the big stuff, the milestones, the finish lines. Micro is everything else, all the small moments that make up a day. For a long time, I only cared about the macro. I thought that was all that mattered.

But I was wrong. Obsessing over the macro means you miss being present. You miss the beauty of the moments you're actually living. I was a hard charger, always chasing the next big thing. I achieved a lot, but my life felt empty. I realized I'd let too many micro-moments slip by, and I knew I had to change. I wrote about that whole transformation in my book, The In-Between: Life in the Micro.

A Macro-Minded Life Damages Relationships

In the past, my focus was always on the macro, on reaching some objective. I was self-centered, seeing any obstacle as just an inconvenience. I wanted outcomes; I didn't care about connections. Because of that, I sacrificed important relationships.

One instance of this that I describe in my book was reuniting with my partner in Denmark during the pandemic. There were issues with my paperwork and visa. Fixing this problem consumed me, and the micro was lost. The whole reason I was there was to be with her, but I ignored this when circumstances changed.

The macro-obsession caused me to lose touch with the moment, eventually ending with a breakup. I hit rock bottom, but there was some good that came out of it. I decided that I no longer wanted to lose out on the in-between.

Before I began the path toward change, I started to see more evidence of choosing the macro over the micro. This mindset kept me inside my safe bubble state, and then I had the chance to really reflect during a health crisis.

Reflecting on the Past of Macro vs. Micro

During my recovery, I couldn’t be active and busy, which was foreign to me. I had a lot of time to think and process things from years prior. I thought of my grandpa and his last days. Because I was too worried about the macro, I didn’t say the things I really wanted to in those days. It was a deep regret. Looking back on it years later, I finally realized why I reacted as I did.

Embracing the Micro

During my reflection and rock-bottom moments, I vowed not to let the macro be in control. I wanted to embrace the micro and never lose relationships or interactions again. It’s not an easy transition, and I’m far from perfect. I relinquished the bubble state so I could cultivate awareness and authenticity. It was an important step that allowed me to venture into the in-between with a new perspective.

You can read more about the macro and micro in my book.

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